Tucson Sammy

Lenny Explains the Living Wage

It’s too bad that there was no Green Party candidate for Mayor. Had we a good Green candidate, we probably would have been entertained by a broader spectrum of issues - including the Living Wage Ordinance. There was no mention of the issue on Tom Volgy’s campaign website. We can assume that Mayor Walkup’s position would have varied depending on the individual, or group, to whom he was speaking. The issue, however, is a favorite of progressive (leftist) and union activists in Tucson and other cities across the country - so it will not be gone for long.

In general, Living Wage Ordinances require city contractors to pay their employees minimum wages from fifty to one hundred per cent higher than the federal minimum. The assertion is that tens of thousands of Tucson heads of households are attempting to support their families working minimum wage jobs, and the pay is not enough; therefore, the mayor and council should wave the magic wand making all jobs good paying jobs! Who could object to that?!

My friend Lenny might object to it. Lenny could find fault with Mother Theresa - or Princess Diana, depending on your inclination. I ran into Lenny at a coffee house, where he was checking out the Free State Project website while listening to the Inside Track radio program on his headphones.

“What’s up?” he said, removing the headphones.

Getting right to the point I said, “Not much. Hey, do you know anything about this Living Wage stuff?”

“Some…why?” he looked at me sideways.

“Well, it seems to me like an easy way to raise the standard of living for the working poor,” I said.

He looked at the ground as if he was embarrassed for me. “And who are these working poor?” he said.

“You know, people working for minimum wage.” I started to get a little nervous.

“80-85% of the people earning minimum wage are either retirees supplementing their pensions, or high school kids working part time so they’ll have enough to buy a twelve pack, some condoms, and a couple of hits of ecstacy for the weekend. Hell! The average household income of the minimum wage earner is $47,000!” he said, looking at me as if I should have known that.

“Well, how about the other 10-15 percent?” I countered, trying to stay in the game.

A leer crept onto his face. He glanced from side to side. Lowering his voice, he began, “That’s the dirty little secret. It’s a way for unions to shut out non-union workers from the workplace.” He paused until it was clear that I wasn’t getting it, then he continued, “Look, compensation relates to productivity. A guy operating a backhoe makes more than a guy with a shovel because he’s more productive. Now, if a guy has a low skill level, he needs an entry into the labor market where he can get started and learn skills on the job; in fact, most full time minimum wage earners receive pay increases within three months of the start of their employment. So, if you price the guy out of the labor market; that is, if you force the pay scale above his level of productivity, he simply will not be employed. This keeps him from competing with union members, it sets aside more work for union members, and it increases unemployment which can be blamed on Republicans. What else did you want to know?”

“You know, Lenny, you really know how to rain on someone’s parade! I don’t see how a little…”

“Why settle for a little?” He interrupted me. “If ten dollars an hour is good, wouldn’t thirty an hour be thrice as good?”

I could see that he was starting to have fun now. “Thrice!?!” I shouted. I knew I was losing, so I had to change the subject. “That’s not a word!”

“Yes it is.” he said calmly, though his jaw was set.

“No it’s not. You think you’re so smart because you can throw a few facts around…”

“Facts are an aspect of reality, which is a hobby of mine; and after all, you asked.”

I hate it when he gets condescending. I had to buy some time, “Nazi!” I said.

“Ha! I win! You always know you’ve won when your antagonist calls you a ‘Nazi’,” Lenny said with a chuckle as he replaced his headphones and returned to his laptop.

I do not know why I ever seek Lenny’s counsel on anything. I was much happier in my support of the Living Wage before I asked him about it. Why, he could even make Fidel look bad!